Well, thanks for showing up
(looking at my watch the time is 11:30 - only a couple of hours late for our
breakfast meeting), you guys want a coffee or anything, or do you want to
start? (the guys pull up chairs, and Jano picks up a knife and starts
cleaning his nails).
Dano:
I wouldn't mind a coffee (yelling to the waitress) COFFEE! COFFEE! HEY
OVER HERE YOO HOO! (the waitress comes over, looking really impressed and
pours coffee for the guys. I sit amazed, all of them except for Vano
poured out half their cups into their water glasses, and then proceed to
use up all the sugar and cream at the table - Vano mixes in a spoon full
of catsup and syrup).
Stano: So,
what (slurp) do you (slurp) want to know?
(I dig out my list of questions)
I'll cut right to it. Why another tribute album? And how did you guys decide
to record It's For You?
Dano:
(slurp) Well, it was (slurp) our manager's idea. He called up
Stano ...
Stano: Yeah, I
got the call ...
Dano: Excuse
me, I was talking.
Stano:
Whatever, but I got the call.
Vano: It was a
phone call?
Dano: Shut up
you.
Vano: Sorry
(slurp).
Dano: I'll
answer the question (slurp). You guys shut up and drink your coffee. (Lots
of sour faces, and much slurping, which is going to make it hard to
transcribe Dano's answer later) Anyway, Stano gets this call, and I can
tell he has no idea what to say to whoever is on the phone (dirty look
from Stano) so he hands me the phone and says "It's for you." I listen to
the pitch and tell him we're in.
Which song?
Dano:
You not paying attention? "It's for You" - stupid (slurp). So I hung up
the phone ...
Vano: The
phone call, is that what we're talking about?
Dano: (glaring
at Vano) Shut - up. So I hang up th...
Vano: You
know, mom always hated it when you told me to shut up.
Stano: Yeah,
she thought it showed poor breeding and reflected badly on her as a
mother.
Jano: He got
in more trouble when he would tell me to fu...
Dano: OKAY!
Look, you want to answer the question (looking at his brothers) or do you
want me to continue? (silence, and slurping) Thank you, (slurp) anyway
funny thing, it turns out Stano had no idea what the heck I was talking
about when I hung up the phone and I told him we'd just committed to
singing "It's for You" for some 77s tribute album.
Vano: Who are
the 77s?
Jano: Some
band who had an album in the 80's that was on Island records around the
same time as The Joshua Tree, except unlike U2's album nobody bought the
77s album.
Vano: Wow,
how'd you know that?
Jano: The
webbernet.
Dano: You
done?
Jano: (slurp)
Yeah.
Hold on, you didn't know the
band, and you'd never heard the song? What are you guys doing submitting a
song to a tribute album if you're not fans?
Dano:
Hey, I never said we weren't fans. We just weren't their fans, that's all
- semantics. We just didn't know the song, but we learned it. I downloaded
the tabs, and thought it was pretty easy to play.
Stano: It's in
G right?
Dano: How
would you know? You can hardly sing let alone play the guitar.
Stano: I can
play the piano. There's a G key on the piano.
Vano:
(stirring in more catsup) Hmmm, there's a G on the bass too.
Dano: Okay, it
was in G. Which made it as easy to play as just about anything written by
Bob Dylan.
Jano: It's for
You is going on a Bob Dylan tribute album? Can I sing a song too, I can
sound like Bob. Check this out, "Mrrrmmrrmmbble Maggie's farrmmmuble
evermmmumble mmband of the handmmmmuble." (silence, followed by a flurry
of crumpled sugar packets bouncing off Jano's head and shoulders)
(I look at my watch, it's 11:50.
The waitress comes over and pours more coffee as well as refreshing our
supply of cream and sugar.) So you're happy with the song? How did you
approach the project?
Jano:
I gotta take a leak.
Stano: Me too.
Vano: I think
the turtle is poking his head out of the shell.
(Disgusted) You guys want to take
five? (the guys leave before I get an answer leaving Dano and me alone at
the table).
Dano:
(slurp) Bunch of taters. In terms of being happy with the song. Yeah, I
think it's pretty good. I mean considering the source material we had to
work with, I think we freakin' rocked. The approach we took in the studio
was surprisingly simple. We plugged in, let the tape roll and tracked the
whole thing in about 15 minutes, including mixing. I mean it was bloody
brilliant. In fact I'd go so far as to say our version is so good that if
you played both songs back to back you'd have a hard time telling the
difference.
(At this point I've had about
enough) Look, I listened to a rough mix on the way over, and Dano - I've got
to ask, did you even listen to the original version that Mike recorded?
Dano:
No. I thought it would be better if we didn't unduly
influence our performance with a lot of clutter.
(The others arrive back, making a
big production out of tucking in their shirts and adjusting their pants.
Vano appears to have toilet paper hanging out the back of his trousers.)
Stano:
Miss anything?
No, Dano and I were just
finishing.
Dano:
We're done?
Yeah, I'm finished.
Dano:
I thought you wanted to talk about Mick Rowe. I even went out and bought
an old Tempest CD just so I wouldn't look like an idiot.
Stano:
(mumbling sarcastically) No chance of that.
Dano: What was
that?
Stano:
Nothing.
Jano: I do
sound like Bob don't I? I can do Tom Petty too, but I have to stick peas
up my nose to get the sound right.
Vano: You're
picking up the tab? (I nod "Yes") Waitress! Menus over here!
(I get up shaking my head. I walk
out debating with myself as to whether or not I should erase the tape)
Jevon the Tall
www.banopernalia.com
June 2004
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